Wednesday, August 29, 2012

Just Some Thoughts: The Effect of Others

I went out yesterday to host my Tuesday evening standing run and quite honestly I did not feel like it. I was not feeling good, I had a sleepless night, have been dealing with some emotional hurt and all I wanted to do was feed my daughter and curl up in the bed. On top of feeling so bad it was starting to look as if I was going to be solo on that run.

I get to the trial early so I could let my daughter get some play time in on the play ground. While I waited to see if any one was going to show up a man, a creepy man at that approaches me puffing on a cigarette, asking me if I would run with him??? He was explaining to me that he was a beginner and that he was looking for people to run with. I wanted to tell him he might want to start by getting rid of the cigarettes but I already felt as though I was talking to an "unsub" and I did not want to make any contribution to being a ripped from the head lines story on Criminal Minds later on in this new tv season.

None the less it made me feel even more apprehensive about running and I was beginning to pile onto the list of excuses as to why I should go home and curl up in the bed. Until I saw a familiar and beautiful face of one of the ladies in my group, then I knew I had to stay. As the ladies began to come in for their run I realized it was do or die and dying is never an option for me folks, so I was just going with "do". I wanted to get in and get out. 

Tuesday night run turned out to be a monumental run for me; I ran non stop for over 3 miles. My group mates ran non stop for over 3 miles. I wanted to cry when I got back to our starting point but I was sweating so much I had no fluid in me left for tears. I had been struggling for weeks to get to the point where I could run non stop with out walking and it happened on a day when I was not feeling it. Our accomplishment and conversation that night made my night. It brought a joy and happiness to me that I really needed in that moment. I know that I had thank the ladies on our forum but I wanted to publicly say, thank you.

I know each of us was not feeling it that night due to what ever was going on in our individual lives at the time but it was each of us that made the issues non existent, at least for me. It all made me realize that being a member of Black Girls Run transcends beyond running. We are family in a sense; we support each other, we encourage each other, we help each other and celebrate each other. I don't think it gets any better than that.

Be blessed and to all a good night.  

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